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No. 6818 Quote report quickreply quickreply
6818

File 1365664673060.jpg


in august, i had an abortion and ever since, i've not been able to enjoy sex or masturbation. i get sore too quickly, to the point of tearing up and nearly crying. thus, i've not had an orgasm for over eight months, and it's becoming extremely frustrating.
so what the fuck do i do, /b/?


>>

go see a doctor, quit complaining about your dumb shit on the internet


>>

Go back to your doctor and ask him for the fetus he aborted out of you. He'll have it in a hazmat bag somewhere around the office, all doctors do.

On your way home with the fetus, pick up a shitton of lube. You're going to need it.

When you get back, set out a bunch of newspaper, strip, and lie on it, on your back. Lube yourself up, and coat the fetus in lube as well for good measure.

Now, very slowly, insert the fetus all the way inside yourself. Make sure to use a swift thrusting motion to get it inside your cervix. This will hurt like hell, but luckily you can just bite your own tongue. Like a bullet!

Once the fetus is all the way inside your cervix, your brain will send secret fetus spices down into the fetus itself, reactivating it. The fetus will reanimate, and begin hitting all the pleasure buttons inside your womb.

This is the problem with abortions. Who's going to man the womb-buttons if there's no fetus inside your womb?

Over time, your pregnancy will develop. Do NOT let this occur. When you feel yourself going into labour, tie your legs together with duct tape. The fetus will attempt to escape, but when it starts to feel its head being crushed by your thighs, it'll get the message and crawl back in.

Hope this helps, good luck.
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>>

>>6820

Beware! This is the secret to make mustard gaz!




No. 7318 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7318

File 1383725732256.jpg


You receive $50,000 tomorrow. You have to spend it. What do you buy?


1 post omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7320
Why bother paying the loan if you're going to kill yourself?

Buy $50,000 worth of drugs, hookers etc and party til you inevitably die of some kind of overdose or by choking on vomit and/or the dick of a tranny hooker you accidentally hired not realizing they were a tranny being so fucked up on drugs.


>>

plane ticket prostitutes of my choice
>why pay for sex beta?
>love cheating and buying women hahahah
>fuck bitches!


>>

>not buying a ps4


>>

Buy a nissan GTR R35


>>

>>7321
Government student loans are a little better about canceling when you die, but privately held student loans? Not so much. They'd find some family member to stick the debt upon. Everybody likes to claim "oh why do I care when I'll be dead anyway" until they actually think about their legacy becoming some obscure niece resenting having to pay for the student loans of some asshole uncle who choked to death on drugs and tranny dick.

$50,000 is a good down payment on, well, probably not your dream home, but a respectable enough rental property right between the suburbs and farm country. You could charge a rent for your entire house that's comparable with an apartment in the nearest city and still make back your initial investment quickly.




No. 9393 Quote report quickreply quickreply
9393

File 1472270109874.jpg


Hey /b/. Trap here just wanna ask for some cosplay suggestions since the night shift is slow.
>5'4"
>105 lbs
Preferably anything with tights.
Not doing pics of myself at work


>>

>>9393
i'm 5'6" and 125 pounds, I've been eating less than 1000 cals a day, any suggestions? I want to reach 110 or so


>>

>>9394
I wish I had advice, I just have a high metabolism


>>

>>9395
i've been underweight as a motherfucker before, pretty much skinny my entire life, but I gained weight like 3 years ago to normal weight or so, and I want to go back to my petite cute body


>> File 1472272085514.jpg
9397

>>9396
hmm, i've been thinking about becoming a trap for a while now. I don't really have lust for cock but it's getting really boring fapping to women and wearing the same clothes all the time.

Why are you a trap?

Fleur, anime was shit but fleur was hot


>> File DSC_0340.jpg
10083

Hi jammy boy.




No. 7521 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7521

File 1386271899921.jpg


What would happen if a sun made of ice would collide with the normal sun, which is made of lava? Both suns are same size, and the sun made of ice is at -1000 Celsius, and the normal sun is at +1000 Celsius.

Would their temperatures cancel each other and leave only empty space, or would they leave a zero degree sun?


3 posts and 1 image omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

7522 - you really worked on that one dint you


>>

The ice star (which doesn't really exist) would melt as it come closer to the "normal' star.

Since a Class G star radiate heat to a distance and ice "stuff" coming it way would melt.


>>

I think the ice sun would get sunburnt. Not sure about the hot sun though. Hope he has a nice cock though.


>>

-1000°C are absolute impossible! Go back to school and take your money back. the lowest possible temperature is -273°C, this is 0K.


>>

....the normal sun, which is made of lava....

I think We need our money back on this guy...




No. 7431 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7431

File 1384984989782.jpg


Name a better death metal album

>protip: you can't


16 posts and 11 images omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

Anata - The Conductor's Departure
Anything from Hieronymus Bosch
Coprofago - Unorthodox Creative Criteria
Beyond Creation - The Aura
Some Decapitated albums, maybe

I personally enjoy Benighted a lot, but I don't consider it that good.


>> File 1000x1000.jpg
8720

Darkthrone


>> File folder_large.jpg
8721

Demilich - Nespithe 


>> File hqdefault.jpg
8759

First album. Gold.


>> File Dismember - Massive Killing Capacity.jpg
10079

Dismember - Massive Killing Capacity ...




No. 7374 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7374

File 1384325687912.png


Great to god tier animes. I need another one to watch.


6 posts and 2 images omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

I love romance.
If you like Inuyasha, watch Dance in the Vampire Bund.


>>

>>7377
Good list, but they forgot Peacemaker Kurogane and Porco Rosso.  Ok they actually forgot most of the great Miyazaki movies.  Bonus points for mentioning Shura no Toki...I thought I was the only one who liked it.


>>

non non biyori is the best anime that I've ever seen. I like too love chunibyo & other delusions same genre but different.


>> File 1461746804749.gif
9346

>>7374
>anime
>god tier
pic one.


>>

Made in Abyss
Cowboy Bebop




No. 7455 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7455

File 1384991996546.jpg


ITT: Unpopular options.

Ex: I think anime is shitty.


4 posts and 2 images omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7455
You sir, are an amazing troll  lol


>>

*argument


>> File Angela Merkel_Hey_Greece.jpg
8590

express the unpopular opinion visually.
Then just kind of, blah blah blah, through some mildly offensive BS to get the conversation started.

then start rip'n assholes


>> File relinquish interest.jpg
8596

opinion


>>

OP is a faggot

Oh wait, it has to be an unpopular opinion.

Never mind.




No. 7574 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7574

File 1388999650563s.jpg


Daily reminder that traps are not women

>Traps are not women.

>Traps will never be women.

>"Gender identity is a socially constructed concept" is itself, a socially constructed concept, your argument is invalid.

>If you like traps you're either gay, or bi, not straight.

>You're a retarded faggot if you think otherwise


>>

You fundamentally misunderstand the meaning of gender. Your argument is invalid.


>>

>>7586
sex and gender are synonymous.


>> File stop.jpg
7588

>>7574

>You're a retarded faggot if you think otherwise
>You're a retarded faggot

Who is the retarded faggot? The guy who fap to what he want? Or the guy who care about what other people fap to?

Rules of the internet m8, if you don't like a thread hide it, if you don't like something ignore it.

Case dissmissed, you are the retard.




No. 7575 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7575

File 1388994043483s.jpg


ITT: tell your gay experiences in greentext will be posting slime until thread kicks off


4 posts omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7579
okay! this is taking so much time haha, but i'll continue

>i fall asleep pretty quickly because im tired af
>wake up to K moving
>"what the fuck dude? go to bed"
>"sorry anon"
>close my eyes and zone out
>about a minute later i feel K rest his hand on my lower calf
>i think nothing of it because of how little room we both have
>K moves his hand up my leg quickly
>i deflect him with lightning quick reflexes, he doesnt even reach my thigh
>K chuckles a bit
>i do the same and then try to go to bed
>no less than a minute later K rushes his hand again up my leg
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>>

>>7581
cont.
>K somehow teleports his hand on my upper thigh before i can react
>he feels my stuffed tshirt and retracts his hand
>at this point i have a raging erection for some reason
>move my hand at the base of my shirt for extra protection
>bonerguard2.0
>K once again darts his hand up my leg
>his hand hits mine
>i cannot move his hand away due to my extra protection
>he just keeps his hand there
>i get goosebumbs and +1 erection
>K slowly pries my hand free
>my defense has been compromised
>the enemy has breached my guard
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>>

>>7582
>his hand is too low
>K's fingers hit my bareskin gooch
>i feel those icy fingers move up to my sack
>he passionately rubs each testicle ever so slightly
>i just stare up in amazement, trying to fathom what is happening
>apparently his arm was stretched as far as it could go, so he shimmies his body down a bit
>his full hand is now around my testicles/gooch
>K snakes his hand up to my raging cock
>his and my breath get heavier
>he leisurely strokes the base of my boner with his soft, tiny hands
>his hand moves up and down, escalating to a steady pace
>using his other hand, K guides my dormant hand to his shorts
>i just go with the flow
>they are too tight to penetrate, so i move my hand to the crotch of his shorts
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>>

>>7583
>i swiftly get a grip of his cock
>it feels different than mine, much more curved and short
>i dont care though, i just stroke away at the little guy
>after around a minute of concentrated stroking, K moves his hand out of my pants
>i am very puzzled
>he props his body up so he is sitting indian style on the couch
>i tilt my head down to see what he is up to
>he peers over the side of the couch, looking at T and H
>i move my head over as well
>T's head is literally a foot aways from mine
>silentpanic.gif
>K assures me "we're good, dont worry"
>i calm down a bit
>K collapses his body so he is facing me
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>>

>>7584
fuck sorry guys, im a bit autistic when it comes to typing. basically after that i just passed out haha. i woke up the next morning wondering what had happened. K and i are still buddies today, we have never talked about our little explorations with anyone. you are the first to here /b/

oh, i have tons of other stories involving K and i throughout middle and high school if you are interested. any takers?




No. 7344 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7344

File 1384233517327.jpg


ITT: things you never learned how to do and are embarrassed about
>never learned to tell time on an analog clock


1 post omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

Never learnt how to shave. I've only ever electric shaved.


>>

>>7346
This. I can't fucking shave to save my god damn life, its awful


>> File 1384234202957.jpg
7348

i never learned how to make friends


>>

>>7348
friends are overrated anyway. i rue the day i ever asked my mom how to make friends.


>> File tumblr_mw2ghzY7ay1sjmpu5o1_500.jpg
7552

>>7349
I just LOVE making Friends!
Working on a couple right now in my secret basement laboratory far beneath my parent's house in the suburbs




No. 7488 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7488

File 1385165112683.jpg


Ok,serious question, how can I make around 150k ? better if fast.. legal or of course illegal ways,what illegal way would be safest/best ?


>>

> go to store
> steal a candybar
> sell it to your friends at elementary at half price
> repeat
Tldr; underage B&


>> File 1385165405051s.jpg
7490

>>7489


>>

ITT some newfag actually asking /b/ how to make money

Did you ever think that everyone on /b/ is so poor the only thing they do for fun is use free WiFi and post shit tier threads?


>>

>>7491
is that what they call an oxymoron


>>

>>7491

You are not on the motherland, dont use word such has "newfag" or "oldfag" here, please.




No. 7479 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7479

File 1385162849397.jpg


Not seen one in a while so stuff thread here, share your beloved items rare or mundane!

>Pic related.


4 posts and 3 images omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>> File 1385164947259.jpg
7484

Galactic trading cards


>>

>>7484
That's pretty cool.


>>

a girlfriend


>> File 1385165940932.jpg
7487

These hot wheels


>>

>>7479
>rare




No. 7437 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7437

File 1384980133538.jpg


So, /b/. What do you think about aliens? I don't mean Ricardo from Puerto Rico. I mean extraterrestrials. Answer me this:

>Do you think they exist?
>Do you think they have visited Earth?
>Do you believe the videos you see on YouTube?
>Does NASA or the Government know something we don't?
>Do you think everyone who thinks the Government is hiding shit from us is a tin-foil hat wearer?
>Why do you think they do or do not exist?

Any more information/links to shit are of course welcome. And please, if you post something that's crazy proof or something else, please use a Proxy or twelve. If the thread 404's, there is something that was posted whether it was information or a video, some shit is getting real.

I advise you to take screenshots of this thread, if things become heated or increasingly "interesting".


6 posts and 2 images omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7437
In answer to your questions, all I can say is what I say to people who insist god exists. I'm sorry but I see no evidence of that.


>>

>>7443
And your evidence for this


>>

You, my friend are exactly right!
I'm surprised that some people here knows this important hidden part of the human history.


>>

>Do you think they exist? 
Yes
>Do you think they have visited Earth? 
There is no definitive proof, and Humans are nothing of interest, but yes. 
>Do you believe the videos you see on YouTube? 
All videos, images, and text pertaining to extraterrestrials is false. For all we know, the visitors in question could be kilometer long space whales that are made of diametrically opposing energies in a self-contained plasmodermic bubbles that communicates on a level in which we cannot comprehend.
>Does NASA or the Government know something we don't? 
Most likely. But then again no one will ever know.
>Do you think everyone who thinks the Government is hiding shit from us is a tin-foil hat wearer? 
Some are, some are not.
>Why do you think they do or do not exist? 
It is entierly improbable that some kind of extraterrestrial life exists in the universe. Be they living in our galactic neighborhood or not. Maybe they live hundreds of trillions of lightyears away from the edges of our known space and we will never know them. Maybe they live on the moon. Nothing to do but speculate. Some form of alien life exists. Either in the form of single celled organisms, small fish, humanoids, or space whales.


>>

>>7534
*Improbable that they do not exist

Fix




No. 7492 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7492

File 1385163599056.jpg


So, /b/, I need a new anime to watch.

I've just finished watching Guilty Crown, and that shit is seriously underrated. I'm surprised it's more more popular. I'm a newcomer to anime, and I really hate most of the anime community, so I'm asking you guys for decent suggestions.

I've seen Code Geass (best piece of media I've ever seen), Elfen Lied, Monster and Death Note.

>tl;dr what's a good anime?


1 post omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>> File 1385163838185s.jpg
7494

>>7493
Thank you. Are there any others that are worth watching?


>> File 1385164171277.jpg
7495

naruto. newest episode gave me feels


>> File 1385164241260s.jpg
7496

darker than black.
though second season is utter shit.


>>

http://myanimelist.net/animelist/Nihhrt

Pick something of my list in the high rankings


>>

>>7497
>dat pretty decent taste

You should watch some older stuff though, Gunbuster, Gundam, Macross, Legend of the Galactic Heroes, Trigun and Cowboy Bebop are fucking brilliant.




No. 7462 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7462

File 1384988771857.png


>older sister called me
>"anon, my computer is broken. Come over to fix it..."
>went over the next day (today)
>she's still at work
>got my own key to her apartment
>found a buttload of useless shareware, freeware and searchbars
>get rid of them, deleted system32...you know, the usual
>computer fixed - sis still not home
>"let's see what the browser history has to say"
>chin hitting the ground, breaking the floor in that process
>found a tons of wincest porn!
>hentai, video, stories...you name it!
>every bit I found was exclusively brother-sister wincest!
>came buckets
>went home
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


2 posts omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7463
This. I look up cuckold porn but I sure as fuck won't let my gf fuck anyone else.

I also look up bro/sis wincest but I don't even have a sister.

That being said, get drunk with her and when she's drunk enough to talk but not so drunk that she can say she forgot what happened later, bring it up.


>>

Obviously she wants the D. Get drunk and fuck!


>>

There is a series of important questions you need to ask yourself, OP:

Is it worth it?

Should you work it?

Could you put your thing down, flip it and reverse it?


>>

>>7466
Will get drunk with her next time...

>>7463
I have a lot of wincest porn, too and I would take a shoot.

>>7467
I think I could work it!

>>7464
But admitting that I was spying on her?
Hmmm...maybe...


>> File 1384990755247.jpg
7469

of course anyone with a hot sister wants to fuck her. just most people dont admit it to themselves

i have a whole pic/vid folder of chicks who look like my sister and fap to it vigorously




No. 7339 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7339

File 1383965450319s.jpg


SEX THREAD

>ask for advice/help
>share stories
>answer questions

No judgement, we are in this thread to enlighten.


>>

>>7339
I havent had sex in 2 years.
Im also super depressed


>>

19 years old, virgin, like 3 lost chances because I'm a romantic pussy...


>>

Hey man, i've been there.  I've had longer dry spells.  I've had to ask myself, "Am I going after sex or a relationship."

It's not a complete solution, but, it got me down the path that I needed to go.


>>

>>7341

I was that romantic pussy and didn't get laid until I was 25.  I don't regret it, but, maybe I could have been more assertive with girls earlier.  

Do you want to have sex with girls that you are in relationships with?  Or, do you just want sex?

Getting sex is easy if you turn off your conscious.  You won't care who they are and what happens after.

Getting sex in a relationship is ALWAYS hard and it will always be hard.

You are living the life that we all are living.

Good luck.




No. 7304 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7304

File 1383547565707.jpg


About to do acid for the first time 1 tab. They told me to do half of one because it's really strong but idgaf.

Any tips? Also, what the hell do I do with this little tab? Swallow it? Let it dissolve in my mouth?


>>

look at videos on youtube of spiders eating things


>>

>>7304
You'll be fine man. With LSD, just keep it on/under your tongue for 5 minutes then swallow it, it's only with the NBOMe family you have to keep it in your mouth for like 30 minutes.
Just look at awesome pictures of nature, and remember that you are on a chemical, nothing bad will happen to you and you will probably experience some weird physical effects, these are all part of the experience. Enjoy yourself and write down/draw as much as you want to help you remember the trip


>>

>>7304
im tripping on 25i right now, 2000ug.

more accurately, im coming down off it. took it around 10 hours ago. its not acid but its very likely what you're getting (cuz real acid's very rare and people use nbome as a replacement all the fucking time).




No. 7300 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7300

File 1383548074161.jpg


How's your life /b/ros?

>18
>Never had a job
>Have my GED
>Just got my license 6 months ago
>Come from low income family
>No college whatsoever
>No jobs calling me back
>No skills or trades at all
>Never owned a car
>Still live with parents

>inb4 I'm a brain surgeon making 6 figures at the age of 21 and fuck bitches everyday while drinking golden tequila


>>

>19
>Graduated high school two years ago
>Haven't done shit since
>Joining Air Force
>Leave for basic in March
>Going for college reasons and to move out
>I still have no idea what I want to study in college
>Could care less about happiness, just as long as I can make enough money to support my self and my family in a middle class home/neighborhood
>Parents are getting a divorce
>Never happy, never sad
>Emotions are just kind of blank
>Hoping I can be happy once I am moved out


>>

>28
>virgin (doesn't bother me, but really seems to get most people)
>college, AA, 1 foreign language class away from BA

>have "attempted" this class multiple times. Hate the arbitrary requirement so much I can never bring myself to complete it.

>Good IT certifications. Turns out I hate sitting behind a desk.

>Co-owned a business. Good ideas, but husband-and-wife co-owners kept out-voting me. Sold shares, business went bankrupt.

>Pizza driver. Hate it.
>About a month away from pilot's license.

>Don't want to work - even flight loses its appeal when I have to do it to live. No way out of it I guess.


>>

>32
>No job now
>high school dep
>Have car, no license
>No gf or bf
>No college whatsoever
>No jobs calling me back
>YouTube partnership that pays less than needed
>Still live with parents
>Just got off bail
fml




No. 7295 Quote report quickreply quickreply
7295

File 1383551101876.png


tl;dr: baw thread

Yesterday I had the worst first date experience with the girl of my dreams.
>Lunch at her place
>She lives with her milf-ish divorced mother and younger sister
>Mother and sister really liked me
>Everyone laughing their hearts out at my stories during lunch
>Mother and sister leave us
>Me and the girl go back to her room and cuddle while watching old anime and youtube crap
>She seems to be enjoying my company
>Time flies by
>Already dark outside
>I have to leave because I have work to finish
>When separating she hugs me so tight I can feel her heartbeat.
>While on the train going home I think how well it went
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.


>> File 1383551190673.jpg
7296

Crying Tomoko makes me sad in my feels place...


>>

>>7295
You sure it was her on skype?


>> File 1383551486364.jpg
7298

I'm pretty sure it was her. Both her mother and sister have their own laptops and I don't think they would do anything like this. And it felt like her style of writing.

We were very close trough skype. Talking everyday about everything from morning to dusk. It was so nice while it lasted.


>>

Wait till tomorrow before messaging her. She is just drunk as fuck and feeling miserable, nothing you can do.




No. 7287 Quote report expand quickreply quickreply
7287

File 1383537663971.png


OKC and POF stories and tips


2 posts omitted. Click on [Reply] or [Expand] to see it.
>>

>>7289
pic?
>Ive been browsing back and forth on both of those
>no luck on match.com plus fuck spending money
>meet new girl every couple months
>act like i want to settle down
>have sex
>break their little hearts when they want a relationship
>profit???


>> File 1383538437767.jpg
7291

>>7290


>>

i was thinking of online dating
pros, cons?


>>

>>7292
Pros
>dont have to go out and buy bar whores drinks
>get their cell after a brief convo
>text them for a week or so
>hang out and see what happens
>profit????
Cons
>make up some bullshit around your friends etc on where you met the girl
>may see people you went to high school with/ people you may know
Its free why not try it?


>>

how many people do you guys message?

I think i've messaged about 10-15 girls in the 2-3 months i've been on the site......

had 2 dates out of that....... and some other short conversations on the phone.....

for some reason i think a girl will message me but they never do.




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